Passio Biographies

Valentine	Deceased: 1423 Marital Status: single Occupation: writer, martyr Hometown: Cumae, Italy Survivor quote:"Nothin' says lovin'" Luxury item: Love arrows Feast day: February 14 Special skills: withstanding torture	St. Valentine was a priest in Rome during the persecution of Christians under Claudius II. He, along with several of his friends, was instrumental in helping these martyrs. He was apprehended by Roman authorities and sentenced to be clubbed to death. When this did not work, he was beheaded on February 14, 270. Valentine, though sometimes depicted as a tiny, cherubic, Cupid-like figure, is actually rugged, determined, and strong. He enjoys roses, chocolates, and little candy hearts.
Juliana	Deceased: 1423 Marital Status: single Occupation: writer, martyr Hometown: Cumae, Italy Survivor quote: "I don't care if you are the Devil..." Luxury item: Miss Cleo's phone number Feast day: May 13 Special skills: withstanding torture, reading secret thoughts	After Juliana's father betrothed her to a Roman pagan without her consent, Juliana made it clear that she would not be married no matter what torture she was put through. The Romans, known for their sadomasochistic tendencies, lived up to their reputation by torturing and beheading her. While she was imprisoned, she had many discussions with a demon, nearly converting him to Christianity. In her free time, Juliana enjoys worshipping God, being an active member of NOW, and tormenting demons.
Perpetua	Deceased: 203 Marital Status: married with child Occupation: Christian convert, martyr Hometown: Rome Survivor quote: "Where's the beef?" Luxury item: bobby pins, ladder to heaven Feast day: March 17 Special skills: good with animals	Both Perpetua and Felicitas were persecuted for their Christian beliefs under the reign of Septimus. However, unlike many martyrs and saints, Perpetua left a written record of the martyrdom of herself and Felicitas. Despite the fact that Perpetua had a newborn son and Felicitas was 8 months pregnant, they were imprisoned along with three other people. After they refused to renounce their Christianity, all were sentenced to face wild beasts in the arena. Granted a miracle by God, Felicitas delivered a healthy baby girls two months early so that she could be martyred with the rest of the prisoners. When the day came, both women were supposed to be killed by a mad heifer. However, both escaped relatively unharmed. Finally, all five martyrs had their throats cut. In their free time (before martyrdom), both women enjoyed spending time with their children, writing, and eating hamburgers.
Felicitas	Deceased: 203 Marital Status: married with child Occupation: servant, martyr Hometown: Rome Survivor quote: "Where's the beef?" Luxury item: Epidural Feast day: March 17 Special skills: giving birth on command	Both Perpetua and Felicitas were persecuted for their Christian beliefs under the reign of Septimus. However, unlike many martyrs and saints, Perpetua left a written record of the martyrdom of herself and Felicitas. Despite the fact that Perpetua had a newborn son and Felicitas was 8 months pregnant, they were imprisoned along with three other people. After they refused to renounce their Christianity, all were sentenced to face wild beasts in the arena. Granted a miracle by God, Felicitas delivered a healthy baby girl two months early so that she could be martyred with the rest of the prisoners. When the day came, both women were supposed to be killed by a mad heifer. However, both escaped relatively unharmed. Finally, all five martyrs had their throats cut. In their free time, both women enjoy spending time with their children, writing, and eating hamburgers.
Edmund	Deceased: 869 Marital Status: single Occupation: king and martyr Hometown: East Angles Survivor quote: "Where are you comrade? 'Here, Here!'" (Ed's head) Luxury item: his head Feast day: November 20 Special skills: speaking through severed head	Edmund had a history that is well known to any respectable Englishman. At the age of 14, he was elected king of Suffolk, England. While fighting the Danes, he was captured and beheaded for a brief period of time. However, his head did not like being separated from his body and promptly reattached itself. In his free time, Edmund likes to wage war on invaders, pray, and be subjected to torture. One of Edmund's favorite hobbies is being speared repeatedly. Edmund describes himself as brave, daring, and not easily killed.
Ursula	Deceased: 451 Marital Status: engaged Occupation: princess, martyr Hometown: somewhere in Britain Survivor quote: "But Daddy, I want a virgin army now" Luxury item: virgin army Feast day: October 21 Special skills: nautical navigation	Ursula's reputation precedes her almost anywhere she goes. Legend has it that she was the daughter of a king. Her father betrothed her to a pagan prince that she did not want to marry. She bargained for a three year reprieve. In addition, Ursula wanted 10 young maidens of excellent lineage. Both herself and the maidens were assigned 1,000 other maidens of good repute each. Every day, the maidens would go out to sea on ships and practice military maneuvers. On their way back from a journey to Rome, the virgins met up with a group of pagan Juns at Cologne. They were slaughtered and martyred in the process. Though her sailing abilities will most likely not benefit her much in the desert, Ursula's outstanding leadership skills certainly will. Like Juliana, she is a member of the National Organization for Women. In her free time, Ursula enjoys sailing and spending time with her friends.